Showing posts with label Canada Day Eh. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Canada Day Eh. Show all posts

Saturday, June 30, 2018

Canada Day ARTISTS...

Oh, What A Party... EH 

... enough of a party 
for me to poop on! 

What a party the Liberal 
Cultural Minister 
-Melanie Joly- 
cooked up for us 
on this day...!!! 

Highlights: 




A BIG PARTY and BIG SHOW 
with a ton of artists 
FEW have EVER heard of...! 
Artists such as...

THE ARKELLS...
... looks more like chumps t'me...!





... what warfs the prrroblem; Arcade Fire couldn't make it? 


THE DEAD SOUTH...




... like, Canadian rednecks - eh
And big fans of Sons of Anarchy and The Walking Dead, probably... 




D.J. SHUB




...what a snob!


BOOGAT 



...it's begging for it: ''booger'' - there, I said it! 


RUTH B. 




... the ''B'' cannot possibly stand for... the same as *me*! 
No way! Speak the truth... Ruth! 


LIGHTS 




... out!


KLO PELGAG 






... que c'est ça?!? 


BRIGITTE BOISJOLI 
-easily the worst performance of the night- 




...blah! 


ROSE COUSINS 




... nah. She isn't cousins with me! 




ELIJAH WOODS & JAMIE FINE 
(with that annoying song again!) 


... real easy, actually - for a doggy! 


JEAN-MARC COUTURE 




... not him, though; not him! 
Can't love this guy nor his music; 
don't know why - it just makes me want to howl...! 




damn.



OK - ENOUGH!!! 


... why couldn't Joly have invited this guy instead: 


He wrote and recorded a song about a CAHIER CANADA - 
surely that qualifies him more than the Couture clod?!? 


PATRICE MICHAUD 




... then again... 

Last but not least, there was some 
*indigenous* content 
in the shapely form of...
ISKWÉ 


... poor little indian grrrl - she's not in the know... 
She's not the only one, mind you:








... nope... nobody knows WHEN the pot will be legal 
- finally!? 








...not-so sharp. eh, KEVIN...








...and, at the end of the day... 
still no legalized marijuana!


but an apology instead! 




...what a crock! 

Sunday, July 2, 2017

150... eh


  WARF!

I can smell the pot from a mile away...!!! 
Que porcaria é esta...?!? 
Pays de mes gongs! 






Saturday, July 1, 2017

This Is... Canadiana!

But why, you ask, why ''Canine Diana'' as, er, hostess here...? When the TLB Prime Network's various other blogs have accustomed us with suitable, intelligent, volubile and eloquent anchors - be they ''Aqua Ann'' on aquamusings, Raina on 365 Days And Reasons To Live or... er, well, it's all downhill from there with Ty - Ty Berius - on a couple of other blogs here and there...!

Anyhow... Diana was, believe it or not, the chosen name for the family dog, way back then... Back in Europe, that is. It is uncertain if she was given the name in honor of an actress of that era or not; both my grandmother and great-grandmother being avid moviegoers in those days. The only actress I could find as a likely candidate for such an 'honor'' would be the British Diana Dors...? Not quite the way one wants to be honored - but, hey, our canine friends are the most noble creatures there are and the most faithful ones too. This Diana was definitely both - and she was a mother, too. She gave birth to several litters during her long and happy life, in fact - happy, I do believe, because she was well taken care of. My mother was the main caretaker, actually, until the day she left Europe to come to... Canada! It was destiny, maybe: a dog named after a (somewhat illustrious) member of the British Commonwealth a.k.a the British Dominion - and then she invades it! My mother, that is; the dog, unfortunately, never joined her - never set paw upon this most frigorifying of countries, as it can to be at times... ''God's Country'' they say - ha! But we'll get to that soon enough, here...

It is to rectify that sad turn that events took - Diana being left behind, living out its short existence with granny and the family on the old piece of land back there, in proud Portugal - that we have decided to add a blog to the network at this time (in what would be Diana's... okay, let's not divulge her age!) and it shall be written and updated from her point of view...!

Diana has nothing to envy Rin Tin Tin, Lassie, The Littlest Hobo, Rex and other famous pooches that wowed the world - for she accomplished amazing feats all her own, too! You will learn about them as we go along here, worry not about that! Diana was and is a valued member of the Family Tree - quite frankly, I value and treasure her memory more than certain humans on those branches, I tell ya...! She is missed since... well, a lot of years (!) quite obviously; and though I never once played fetch with her (!) I remember her... And she will make a spectacular return now - here!

So here is... Canine Diana!
(Canadian Diana?)
and her view of what 
Canadiana 
is all about...


Grass.

That's all there is there... grass!

And even that is not consistent; 
after all, the first few potential settlers 
frowned upon this crap 
when they saw it freezing over so easily! 

''Nem Cana Dà!''

That's what they left behind, on a sign, for all to read...
Toda gente que podem ler Português, claro...!
The dumb French obviously couldn't...



''Oh Yeah - *I* am the perfect spokescritter for this 
DOG OF A COUNTRY... *me* Canadiana! 
Canine Diana! Whatever... eh?''

Flash-forward a few little centuries of pure confusion, 
and you get this now: 

What a joke! 

C'est ÇA... LA CANADA???

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA 
- warf! 



...not even close to *my* favorite song: 
''I'm A Bitch!''










whatever!!!